Addictionland - Addiction Recovery Blog

This blog could fit in the category of co-addiction or food addiction. More importantly, it is about recovery from whatever imbalance comes your way. While New Year's Resolutions attempt to bring balance to a life yet often fail to do so, recovery offers a tried and true way to observe ourselves when we are out of balance and to choose the tools that will help us regain balance as we face whatever life offers.

One of the great things about the New Year is the opportunity it gives us to begin again. No matter how many times we have tried and failed, the New Year invites us to pick ourselves back up and do it again. Recovery goes so well with this concept, as for many of us, including and especially family members, starting over is pretty much what we do.

We communicate effectively with our loved one and then suddenly, something happens and we lose it again. We detach for moments, hours or days at a time, and then find ourselves upset again by the actions of those we love.

This process, one that one of my recovery teachers referred to as “Practice, Practice. Fall, Fall. Practice, Practice. Fall, Fall” can happen at any time of the day or year. But the New Year offers a reminder of how important it is to make a new beginning. Turning the page on the past seems easier on January 1^st. Somehow, it’s expected. It’s time for new resolutions. AS the old saying says, “Out with the old and in with the new!”

I know I am juggling too many plates at once when I develop an uncontrollable twitch in my eye. Besides working a full time pharmaceutical job, I sponsor multiple girls in recovery, care for a 4 year old child, manage Addictionland and finalize my query letter.

While each activity is rewarding, the load of responsibility is more than I can handle at once. At this juncture of my recovery, balancing all aspects of my life is a challange.  I still do everything in extremes. Like my physician father who put his whole heart into the treatment and care of his patients, I put my whole heart into my career/recovery/childrearing and have little energy or enthusiasm for romance or relaxation.

I sense I am going through a big shift in my recovery because I can feel it within.  I am exhausted and stressed because I won't let go and let G-d. While I am excellent at pharmaceutical sales/promotions, I no longer want to be selling medications to doctors. Instead, I want to use my passion and skill set to educate people on the miracle of personal transformation with 12 step recovery. To achieve that, I must surrender my current income stream and trust that my needs will be met when I put my full attention on my heart's desire..

The universe keeps sending me signs to go with the flow and follow my dream. Unbelievable people and opportunities keep knocking on Addictionland's door.  My good awaits me and I can only accept it if I open both hands, drop the weight and allow myself to be happy.